Articles Of Interest
A recent article by Dr. Alan Wolfelt, an expert on grief, explored why some people experience deep grief with the loss of a pet. Unlike some nations, in America, 84% of people consider their pets to be a member of the family. Dr. Wolfelt’s article cites a survey that indicates that 99 percent of pet owners talk to their pets, and 54 percent celebrate their pet’s birthday. We even have greeting cards specifically for pets.
When an animal, who is considered a family member dies, families experience a significant loss. But society doesn’t provide for the same acknowledgement of mourning as it does when a human member of the family dies. Some who may not have experienced the same special bond with pets may dismiss your grief. Others may consider animals to be easily replaceable and encourage you to go out and get another pet right away in order to help with your grief.
Before you bring another pet into the family, realize that everyone needs time to grieve and heal after a pet dies. Like with any loss, each person has their own timeline and ways that they move through the process of grief, some faster than others.
Truth be told, we may have more interactions and daily routines that we develop with our pets than the humans in our lives. Since we are responsible for their care, we spend a great deal of time walking them, playing and feeding them. Our interactions with pets become ingrained in the fabric of our lives and when they die our daily routine is disrupted, a constant reminder of the loss.
As with human death, acknowledging the loss in a tangible way helps start the healing process. There’s no rule that says you can’t have a funeral for a pet. Consider ways that will help your family gather and pay tribute to a pet who was loved. Be sure to involve your children and allow them to grieve for their pet. Any child old enough to love is old enough to grieve and many children have very special bonds with their pets.
Dr. Wolfelt explains, “You may not experience the same depth of loss as your children when a family pet dies. Your response during this time can make the difference whether children’s first exposure to death will be a positive or a negative part of their personal growth and development.”